i wish, thrice over

i didn’t ask for it,

i’m no fan of blood and gore.

couldn’t it have waited a little more-

the stain and pain?

why did nature have to mark,

childhood’s end in forever red discharge?


for me it used to be routine-

climb the fence and stretch for water apples;

but it was their fence, fine!

And their rules and when they said

i could climb no more, i grappled

with what had changed-

the water apples? the fence?

me? what’s my offence?



my skin isn’t numb

and i can bear  only so much

brush, grope, poke and pinch.

i berate not him or his thumb

but me and the thoughts i provoke:

conditioned by nature, them

and now me and my tiresome theme!


i wish, thrice over:

i wish not to be marked,

i wish not to be fenced,

i wish not to be prey

to savage, hungry thoughts.

do i have choice? now?

i wish i were a man,

free to do as he pleases,

free to build the fences,

free to prey,



or ravage.

p.s: Wrote this in response to this weekend’s Trifecta Challenge (http://www.trifectawritingchallenge.com/2012/06/trifextra-week-twenty.html) which requires us to look within and come up with a stylized version of  a truish account that is drawn from life and which can be clearly identified by the number three.

I grew up in small-town Kerala (southern tip of India) and there are the thoughts that went through my adolescent mind and I often did wish I could trade places with any boy in the neighborhood.

About rashmenon

Hello there! Please look up- https://rashscribbles.wordpress.com/2011/02/27/hello-world/
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16 Responses to i wish, thrice over

  1. Balchan says:

    Absolutely brilliant. You are growing in stature. Very poignant words and the mood just took the breath away. Well done !

  2. I really like this! Especially the last four lines. Good thing the awkwardness of adolescence is over, eh?

  3. Libby says:

    Powerful! Beautiful! Even over here in the States, where I guess they are more liberal with girls, I had some of those same thoughts and feelings that you expressed so superbly!

    • rashmenon says:

      🙂 thank you. good to know that such thoughts go through other people’s minds too and bad to know that girls aren’t treated as they should be elsewhere either

  4. Yes, I can absolutely say that your words have universal appeal to women the world over. The transition from the loss of childhood into the loss of innocence is beautifully expressed here.

  5. jannatwrites says:

    Wow, this is a very powerful description of the awkwardness of teenage changes. I remember thinking on occasion that it would be easier to be a man, too 🙂

  6. As a kid I also often wished to be a boy. I thought they had a freedom I could never possess. Now though, I wouldn’t change being a woman for the world.
    You really captured that childhood feeling.
    Thanks for sharing this with us. Please come back tomorrow for the new prompt.

  7. Neetika says:

    Nicely done! Its probably a phase in each girl’s life… one that she has to learn to deal with cos there’s no other way. Especially loved how it ends. 🙂

  8. dewdrop says:

    Brillant ! You have expressed the feeling of the adolescent mind so poignantly !

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